YouTube speaks: twenty-four "weird" dolls of the sixties and seventies

This one is another post inspired by YouTube; I'm always on YouTube, so I may make this a series.  Anyway, during one of my nightly YouTube benders I found this video about twenty-four dolls from the sixties and seventies that might be considered odd, either back then or now.  I thought it was interesting and decided to issue my opinions, because my opinions are SOOOOOOO important!  The video can be found here, and spoilers:  some of 'em aren't that weird in my book.  Kinda like...

ROCK FLOWERS

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1971-1973

Rock Flowers were kinda Mattel's answer to Dawn, small dollhouse-sized dolls that wore bright, trendy-for-the-era clothes, bent their arms and legs, and danced on record players.  The dolls were music-themed and came with their own records, but otherwise they look pretty innocent to me.  The narrator wasn't a big fan of how their doll smelled, and the doll wouldn't sit up for tea parties either.  Legit gripes, both of those.  One of my "scented" dolls stunk up her whole box, and I HATE it when I want my dolls to sit up and they won't.  The narrator also critiqued the Rock Flowers' staring eyes, and I think that critique IS dumb because all dolls stare.  Smart Dolls, Mumpy Terri Lee, Cabbage Patch Kids, American Girls, Barbie, they all stare.  

WEIRD FACTOR:  2 out of 10.  I don't really find these weird at all, in fact.  They're dated a bit, yes, but then so are many dolls of this era.  My review on Heather can be seen here.

DUSTY/SKYE

COMPANY:  Kenner
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1974

Dusty and her friend Skye were sports-themed dolls, apparently designed to get girls active.  The duo could ski, play golf, and play tennis.  The narrator says that when their friend's Dusty did ski she made a "nails on a chalkboard" noise.  They also weren't in love with the dolls' faces...or their hair, or their clothes.  Dusty and Skye apparently had nice sets of joints, but those joints cracked louder than my knees do when I'm struggling to stand.  I wouldn't have liked that as a kid; when a doll's joint cracked too loud I was immediately afraid that I'd broken something.

WEIRD FACTOR:  6 out of 10.  I can only presume that Dusty and Skye were created to attract boys and tomboys...kids that don't usually play with dolls, period, even if the doll in question is sports-themed.  If my presumption is correct then the gimmick fell flat right out of the gate.  I personally also find the duo homely, and I know I'm not the only one who feels that way.  Tomboys aren't always plain of face, though they are often depicted as such.  Tam discusses Dusty here and Skye here.

JODY

COMPANY:  Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1975

Copper topped Jody, also called Jody the Country Girl, this doll represented country life in the Victorian era.  Kinda fitting, since Little House on the Prairie was big back then.  Once again, the narrator said their Jody smelled funny, had stiff hair, and stared.  She also could apparently look pretty menacing when wielding a pitchfork.  I personally love her period-accurate accessories,  though, especially her old-timey wall-mount telephone.  

WEIRD FACTOR:  3 out of 10.  Country living was kinda a thing in the seventies, and it still is to some extent today.  The only thing I don't really like about Jody is her skirt, which is impractically long for country life.  But then again, she does represent an era where skirts WERE that long.  Like the Rock Flowers, Jody is a hair dated, but that's all.  Tam also has featured this doll on her blog.

SMARTY PANTS

COMPANY:  Topper
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1971

This one is one I wasn't familiar with, and I'm already not in love with the name.  "Smarty pants" is usually thrown around in a derogatory manner.  I'd have liked the trivia factor, though.  Yes, Smarty asked trivia questions, and if you got it right she'd congratulate you.  The narrator called her "bossy" and stated that Smarty was not the most cuddly thing.  Worse, she asked multiplication questions, so that wouldn't have pleased me as a kid.  Multiplication was the bane of my existence when I was Smarty's target age.  Smarty also wore glasses that could throw light wrong, and she wasn't dressed very stylish like.  As a result, the narrator said she looked like a "mean teacher."  Oh, and guess where Smarty's batteries go???  Right up her butt!

WEIRD FACTOR:  5 out of 10.  She's cute, but who wants to be asked questions when they're trying to relax and play?  I don't, even if I do like trivia!  I had a laugh at the battery placement, though.

SWINGY

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1968

Our resident Paul Revere and the Raiders fan!  Swingy is a little go-go dancer, styled for the era, and I freaking love her.  The poor love is quite noisy when she moves, though, and apparently her hair would get caught in her joints too.  And guess what else?  The narrator reported that Swingy smelled funny.  Hell's bells, my mama's old Barbie smells funny too, kinda like crayons.  I think that was the norm for dolls of the era, because that's how plastic was and still is.

WEIRD FACTOR:  1 out of 10.  I don't find Swingy weird at all, but then I'm a bit biased because I like her.

CRISSY

COMPANY:  Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1969-1974

Ah, Crissy, of whom I'm very fond.  Crissy and company had hair that grew and could retract again, and if you were good with styling you could give her curls or updos or what-have-you.  Unfortunately, Narrator reports that in addition to feeling nasty right out of the package, their Crissy's hair would break and they'd be left holding shanks of hair.  Funny, I've not had that issue with my dolls' hair, but then I usually just braid it to avoid tangles.  I wonder if Narrator's doll was one of the first issue dolls; Crissy and Beth says that that hair was different from the hair of later dolls.  I've also gotta admit that pulling a doll's hair to make it grow sounds excruciating, but I can't think of any better way to get the hair out.  Hardcore readers of my blog will remember my main gripe with Crissy:  her eyes are ridiculously dark, darker even than the darkest American Girl eyes.  Mia, one of Velvet's friends, has the exact opposite effect; her eyes are a smidge bright.  And yet Mia is one of my favorites of the bunch due to her exuberant smile.

WEIRD FACTOR:  Mmmm...4 out of 10, mostly for the eyes.  Crissy's eyes are WAAAAY too dark.  I might bump the Look Around variants up to 6 out of 10, as the "look around" feature is kinda creepy.  Y'all can read my review of Crissy here; I also own two Velvets and a Cinnamon, and I'm keeping my eyes peeled for Tara.  Tam has a few of these dolls too; indeed, one of my Velvets belonged to her!  

THIRSTEE WALKER

COMPANY:  Horsman
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1964

Yes, that is a screenshot, LOL.  Several of these images are.  Thirstee Walker walked, drank, and cried, which is admittedly an unusual combo of gimmicks.  None of my walkers drink, for example.  The water proved problematic, as it sloshed around, leaked from the doll in various unusual places, smelled stale, and undoubtedly caused the doll to mildew.  I'd have kept water a million miles away from this gal.

WEIRD FACTOR:  6 out of 10.  She looks innocent enuff, but why make a doll drink when she can't pee it back out???

CHEERFUL TEARFUL

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1965

Cheerful's name says it all:  she could be happy or sad depending on how her arm was positioned.  She could cry real tears like Thirstee Walker, but she had a pee hole so the water wouldn't build up inside and get icky.  Like Dusty, Cheerful made a racket when her arm was moved, and sometimes she'd get stuck between happy and sad.  The smaller variant, Tiny Cheerful Tearful, had sunken eyes that attract dust, throw funny shadows, and make the doll look sick.  I'd know, because I own her!  My review of Tiny Cheerful Tearful can be found here, and if you watch the video, you may notice that one of the pictures of Tiny looks familiar. 

WEIRD FACTOR:  6 out of 10.  That shifting face is admittedly a little freaky.  Tiny Cheerful Tearful also looks a little ill with those hollow eyes.

BABY FIRST STEP

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1964

Another walker, though this young lady walks the same way Swingy dances:  by shuffling her feet and swinging her arms.  Like Swingy she's noisy when she walks, and the narrator claimed that this doll could spontaneously walk by herself.  Knowing mechanical items like I do, there's probably some truth to that.

WEIRD FACTOR:  1 out of 10, just like Swingy.  The two could be sisters, except that they don't look the same in the face.  Tam has discussed this doll on her blog.

CHATTY CATHY 

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1959-1965

Chatty Cathy?  MY Chatty Cathy, weird?  Well...if you ask my sister then she's worse than weird.  Most doll fans are at least vaguely familiar with this doll, either because they lived in the era, because they saw the GEICO commercial, or because they like The Twilight Zone.  As for weird...well, Cathy doesn't blink when she talks (most dolls don't), her mech made an ominous grinding sound when activated, and...yeah, I can see why some folks would be a bit weirded out by Chatty Cathy.  Nonetheless, to date she is Mattel's second most popular doll, behind only Barbie.

WEIRD FACTOR:  I'll give her a 5 out of 10.  I've gotta admit that it's freaky how she stares and talks without blinking.  To be fair, I don't like that about Amazing Maddie or my other talking dolls either.  Furthermore, I always thought it was odd that some of these dolls declared "I hurt myself!"  Another of my chatterboxes, Teenie Talk, says something similar, but she then asks me to kiss it, so it makes a bit more sense.  Big surprise, Tam also has a few of these, and two of 'em have pigtails.  I think the ones with pigtails are cute.

CHARMIN' CHATTY

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1963-1964

Chatty Cathy's sister of sorts, Charmin' relied on records to speak, and that right there is a smidge problematic.  Fans of old vinyls know how records can get scratched, and when that happens they skip or repeat.  This sometimes happened to Charmin' Chatty!  She also was a little goofy in the face, to the point that some folks think she's ugly (I think she's hilarious).  I will say that Charmin' isn't as quiz-kid as Smarty Pants is; one of her records has her making animal sounds, which kids love to do.  So Charmin' had a goofy side.

WEIRD FACTOR:  I'll give her a 4 out of 10, a little lower than Chatty Cathy.  She doesn't blink when she talks either, but as I said above few dolls can do that.  The skipping records are my main reason for her landing a 4.  Once again, please take a look at Tam's doll.  She's missing her glasses, but she's still cute.

TINY TEARS

COMPANY:  American Character
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1950-1965

One of the more well-known vintage dolls, Tiny Tears is a crier and could wet her diapers as well.  Narrator says that this doll's voice sounded too realistic at times (so do Cry Babies!) and that she'd go off at random sometimes.  If not properly dried her tears would gather dust and make the poor poppet look unwell.  Hmmm...I never had that problem with the handful of criers that I played with.  She apparently also reeked after being fed.

WEIRD FACTOR:  2 out of 10.  She's a crier, no worse than the Cry Babies of today, though as with Thirstee Walker I'd be concerned with mildew over time.  Thus why I keep water away from Ayla and Kathy Cry Baby, even though they were meant to have water inside them.  Tam has this one too, and hers is really cute.

BETSY WETSY

COMPANY:  Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1937-1983, give or take

Killecrankie, I had no idea that Betsy Wetsy had been around that long!  Narrator says that this doll retained water like Thirstee Walker (and probably Tiny Tears) did, and predictably that started to smell after awhile.  Her hair could also turn green from the chlorine in the water.  Interesting, I knew that could happen to polar bears, but apparently it can happen to dolls too!  Narrator didn't add that unlike Tiny Tears, Betsy's nose runs when she cries, adding another orifice to be cleaned. 

WEIRD FACTOR:  4 out of 10.  She's a crier like Tiny Tears, but the runny nose bumps the weird factor up a bit.  Yeah, we've all had a runny nose from time to time, but it's not a common feature on our dolls unless they're little sickies, which Betsy is not.

BABY ALIVE 

COMPANY:  Kenner
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1973-present day (sort of)

We're talking the original one here!  Baby Alive is still very much alive in the present day, but boy howdy, has she changed!  Y'all have seen my little trio, and they look nothing like the doll of the seventies.

The original Baby Alive ate more-or-less real baby food, and she could drink from her bottle as well.  Our narrator hero states that feeding the doll AND changing her diaper were jobs for a biohazard team, and her chewing and sucking mechanisms made ominous grinding noises.  Having seen the food, I have to agree that it doesn't look the most appetizing in the world, and I wouldn't want to change that diaper either.

WEIRD FACTOR:  6 out of 10 for a doll that eats colored sludge and calls it food.  Even Snackin' Sara's Play-Doh turdlets looked more like something a doll could eat.

FLATSIES

COMPANY:  Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1969-1973

Flatsies, Flatsies, they're flat and that's that!  I thought that these dolls were...well, flat, but it turns out that there's more to them than that.  Flatsies could apparently be inflated like little balloons, or little blow-up dolls, take your pick.  They didn't always inflate fully, and over time their air would leak out, which Narrator said was freaky because of the noise it made.  Hmmm...the Flatsies I'm familiar with don't inflate.  They just are...well, FLAT, with legs and arms that bend like Tutti and Todd dolls.  They live in picture frames and thus can double as a wall hanging, so that's something.  Score one for storage!

WEIRD FACTOR:  Ohhhhhh...5 out of 10.  They're cute, they're flexible, they've got rooted hair...and they're flat.  That's kinda strange, but not outrageously so.

BABY SECRET

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1965

Narrator's frequent comparisons of Baby Secret to a stupid spy didn't contribute to my enjoyment of this segment.  Baby Secret DOES whisper secrets, but they're innocent little messages that normally wouldn't give kids the all-overs.  Now granted, the whispering voice does freak me out a bit, and some of her phrases sound a mite R-rated to someone with a dirty mind (I admit it, LOL).  Baby Secret also has a mouth that moves, just like Teenie Talk and Baby See 'n' Say do.  Some find that disturbing, but I think it's cute.  The doll's eyes look ever so slightly pissed though, making Baby Secret look like she's about to whisper "Go jump off a cliff."

WEIRD FACTOR:  5 out of 10.  Talking dolls are nothing new, but the whisper sounds a mite sinister, and the doll looks like she might be a biter.  Kinda like Teenie Talk, the same one who asks me to kiss her finger.

I love Teenie, but I never have fully trusted her.  She looks like she'd like to bite a plug outta my arm.  Hmmm, I need to give that dress a bath.

SPORT AND SHAVE KEN

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1980

Ken had already had facial hair by the time this guy came around; Now Look Ken had fuzzy stickers that allowed him to wear a mustache, sideburns, or channel his inner Barry Gibb.  Whatever you wanted; I thought it was a riot, by the way, that Now Look Ken's commercial equated a mustache with a villain.  But we're talking about Sport and Shave Ken, whose beard came from this gommy black marker.  You drew on his face and then shaved it off with a razor that didn't actually cut anything.  Now, if you had a man in your life that wore a beard (like I did), then you knew that beards require a fair amount of maintenance, just like the hair on our heads, and you knew what razors were for.  So a Ken with a razor doesn't weird me out much, but the gloppy paint that made this particular doll's beard was kinda gross.  The narrator agreed.

WEIRD FACTOR:  4 out of 10.  The marker looked weird when it was in place.  Indeed, this is the only Ken I've seen with facial hair that looked better without.  Shaving Fun Ken looks amazing with a beard...drat it, I miss being able to take my dolls outside like Tam and Miss Emily do!!!  As an aside, Jenjoy notes that this Ken was the only one with his particular head mold.  Kinda cool!

SALLY SECRETS 

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1992-1994

Sally is a glitzy toddler doll from the nineties...wait a minute, I thought we were doing the seventies and earlier.  But as I've stated in the past Sally has a number of artsy little items that were trendy in the nineties, and she carries them on various parts of her body.  Her shoes and earrings hide little stamps, and stickers come out of...wait a minute, her body???  Yep.  I gotta admit that that's kinda weird.  Sally's sister/friend (I'm not sure which) Penni Secrets carries her stickers in her hair bow, which makes a tiny bit more sense.  I bet Penni's bow would be a heavy one though, and I know of old that heavy hair bows are extremely uncomfortable.

WEIRD FACTOR:  6 out of 10.  The child does have stickers coming out of her chest, after all.  I love this doll, though!

MY PRETTY BALLERINA 

COMPANY:  Tyco
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:

Also not an oldie, but she is highly similar to Dancerina and Dancerella, who ARE products of the Me Decade.  My Pretty Ballerina sometimes appears on lists of glitzy toddler dolls, and...I guess she could count as such.  Narrator states that this doll danced semi-on her own, and she'd continue to do so after her music stopped, which they found kinda disturbing.  I'll add in my two cents and say that the doll looks a smidge stoned.  Since she's a doll My Pretty Ballerina also looks robotic when she moves, but...well, she's a doll!  They don't move exactly like we do.

WEIRD FACTOR: 2 out of 10.  I think she's cool.

HUGO, MAN OF A THOUSAND FACES

COMPANY:
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:

Okay, now THIS one made me raise an eyebrow.  Hugo is actually a puppet and is geared towards little boys, and he has facial features that one can attach to make him look like someone/something else.  He's even got SCARS!!!  I love the concept, but Narrator says that it was hard to get the pieces on straight, and they left a sticky residue.  I wonder if that sticky stuff didn't wear off after awhile, and I know darn good and well that the sticky stuff gathered debris with time.  All sticky stuff does.  Narrator also notes that Hugo is weird-looking even without his extra features, with them big ol' eyes that stare.  

WEIRD FACTOR:  8 out of 10.  Hugo is a very interesting concept, but he's still pretty odd to look at.

BABY SOFT SOUNDS

COMPANY:  Fisher-Price
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1979

According to Narrator this doll recorded your voice, but the playback wasn't great.  She oddly could pick up on conversations while one thought she was off, and she also smelled like "old batteries," as the video put it.  Now the dolls that I've seen make no mention of an internal recording device, but they were out-of-box so I have no way of knowing for sure.

WEIRD FACTOR:  Mmmm...3 out of 10.  To me she's no weirder than Little Miss Echo.

BLESS YOU BABY TENDER LOVE 

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1975

Bless You Baby Tender Love.  She looks pretty innocent, if a little orange.  Bless You Baby Tender Love sneezes when her belly is squeezed, and because she takes a bottle her sneezes are realistically wet.  Narrator stated that they owned this doll, and in addition to sneezing the little doll sounds like she's wheezing too (which she does).  They felt bad for this doll because she was always sick and couldn't be made better.

WEIRD FACTOR:  7 out of 10.  Sick dolls are nothing new, but usually they show some other symptom besides the sneeze, and a lot of 'em alternate between periods of illness and periods of wellness.  Tam thinks this one is weird too, by the way, and...well, obviously I think she's kinda weird, or I wouldn't have given her a 7 out of 10!  I intend to review this doll eventually, but life keeps getting in the way.

GROWING UP SKIPPER

COMPANY:  Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  1975

The infamous Growing Up Skipper, the doll who goes through puberty with a twist of her arm.  Skip and her friend Ginger were both in on it, and the backlash against these dolls was so great that Ginger never appeared again.  Anyway, Narrator notes that like several of these other dolls Skip smelled funny, and I think she clicked, and sometimes she'd get stuck between her short/child self and her tall/teenage self.  Poor child, sounds like she was the type who got tall and awkward as she grew.  I don't know which is worse, being chubby during the gawky stage or being tall with big klutzy feet.  I was chubby, my best friend got tall and gangly, and we both HATED it.

WEIRD FACTOR:  7 out of 10.  Puberty is a natural, normal part of life, but I'll admit that a doll that goes through it is kinda odd.  Oh, and by the way, My Scene revisited the growing up gimmick with the Growing Up Glam line.  I'd rank them the same, 7 out of 10 on the weird scale. 

TUB AND TOOT 

COMPANY:  Toys R Us
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:  2014

This doll is modern, not a seventies thing, but otherwise she belongs on this list.  Why???  Because she FARTS IN HER BATHTUB!!!  Let's be real, we've all farted in the bathtub at some point, and the racket it makes is hilarious.  But...is it really worth it to make a doll that does it?  I mean, this doll is completely innocent-looking, but press that button on her belly and...oh, not only does she make the noise, but she also apparently blows bubbles with her butt.  Sigh...I have no other words.

WEIRD FACTOR:  9 out of 10.  What the actual heck???  A farting doll???  Miss Emily discussed this one once, and she too was pretty weirded out.

I'm surprised that Saucy wasn't on the list!  Blythe isn't either, and she was so weird that peeps didn't buy her.  Neither of them are as weird as Hugo with his funny faces, and even he's not as weird as Tub and Toot, but still...I'd rank Saucy a 7 out of 10 and Blythe an 8 out of 10.  Keep in mind that I'm a big fan of both dolls.

Other good candidates for the list would've been Susie Sad-Eyes, Emerald the Enchanting Witch, Little Miss No-Name, and Joey Stivic, the last of whom was...don't quote me, but I think he was one of the first mass-produced anatomically correct boy dolls.  His commercial made a big deal of this aspect.  Furthermore, I don't think All In the Family was geared towards kids, not with the language Archie Bunker used!  I think All In the Family is a riot myself, but then I'm 37 and won't be confused or horrified by the situations on the show.  Thus I think the Joey Stivic doll probably was way over the heads of seventies kids.  Now, disclaimer: I mean no shade towards ANY of these dolls, not even Tub and Toot.  Indeed, Little Miss No-Name is very high on my wish list, and I own several of the others already.  But y'all gotta admit, they're not your average dolls.

What say y'all?  Do you know of any little weirdoes that belong on this list?

Cheers,
RagingMoon1987

An early Christmas

First I'll run over the things I bought for myself.  With a semi (LOL).

Hedda Get Bedda and Cindy Lou Who.  The bane of my mother's existence vs. the Grinch's stumbling block.  I'll discuss Hedda in more detail in the coming weeks, while Cindy Lou...well, she's cute, but once you've owned one My Life doll you've essentially owned 'em all.  Same tight joints, same sedate face, same inability to stand.  But...I won't knock those pajamas!

For someone so unlovable, everyone seems to love the Grinch.  Goodness knows my mama does, and so does Luciana.  Remember this?

I've got another of my dolls dressed in Grinch garb too, but I'm holding her back until my doll-sized Christmas tree gets here.  And if I ever get my front room presentable then I need to dress a whole gaggle of my girls in Grinch garb.  Hey, alliteration! 

Then I picked up a Sweet Sue doll.  She's well-dressed and came with a small wardrobe.  Her hair needs a little tidying.

Lastly, I got a G1 Abbey Bominable, a character that I always wanted in G1 form but never got.

She's Geek Shriek Abbey, one of the last Abbey dolls from the G1 era.  Geek Shriek was a budget line, which I always liked because you got a full doll with a full outfit, but for maybe half the price.  Plus, anything that pays tribute to nerds and geeks is a good thing in my book.  Abbey will be helping out with a review in the...well, in the not-too-distant future, but it will be a couple'a months away.  I'll keep y'all (and myself) entertained in the meantime, though.  Promise!

So let's skip on to the stuff that Tam sent me.  Poor Tam apologized in her email about sending me stuff when I've complained about storage, and I'll admit something right here and now:  the storage issue is my own fault.  If I'd get my doll room organized and put in some kind of order, and then I'll have room for nice new stuff.  

That said, I've got a box of nice new stuff!  Or it's nice new-to-me stuff, courtesy of my buddy Tam.  I recognized this first one right off the bat.  She's Velvet, but she's Talky Velvet.  See the grille in her stomach?

She needs her talking mech repaired, and she needs some new lashes, but otherwise she looks fine.  I've already got clothes and shoes on the way for her.

Then there's these two, who need no introduction.

Cloe times two!  LOL, Tam remembers how much I love Bratz dolls!  The dressed Cloe appears to be from the Flashback Fever line, and she's got very pretty lips.

I remember the Flashback Fever line!  My favorite one was Jade, because she was JADE and because she was Mod (and because her minidress was green), but these dolls came with compact disks that drove the cost up so I just looked.  Cloe represented the eighties.  My particular doll has a delicate neck so I'll need to treat her with care...or just bust out the super glue and freeze that joint completely.  Whatever works.  The other Cloe doesn't have a stitch to her name.  

No biggie, I've got an outfit coming for her too, and said outfit comes with shoes.  This Cloe is a later doll, from the fish-lipped era, but that's no problem either.  I have fish-lipped Bratz and I treat them like I treat the other Bratz.  This one has a sweet face...well, sweet for a Bratz doll.

I think she may be a Black Friday Cloe, but I'm not certain.

This last one is a bit of a surprise and a bit of an enigma.  She's vintage like I like, and her name is Tammy, but her tag says "Horsman."

The back of her neck is marked "H" too, so the Horsman label is definitely right.

She's welcome no matter who she is, but because I'm eternally curious I want to learn more about her.  A quick perusal of Google Images suggests that she may be Mary Poppins, and if so then that would explain why she looks a bit bigger than Tammy does.  Mary is a nice, statuesque doll, at an even twelve inches in height.

Oh yes, and I got some blue vinyl boots.  Shoes this size are always appreciated.

River Song likes blue, so I think I'll give these to her...when and if I see her again.

Now...I mentioned my storage woes, right?  They're well on their way to being solved.  Look what Mommy got for me!

A FREAKING SHED!!!  Watching the men install it was quite the event.  Oh, nothing bad happened.  It was just interesting watching them raise one end and then the other and then propping up this area or that.  They used a gizmo that looks like a miniature forklift.  Mama would've loved watching this part; she likes vehicles that do heavy work.

Here they've moved to the back and are working to get the rear end leveled.

Putting it in took about thirty minutes, tops.  The shed locks and has a door and a window, plus a porch where I can put a small chair if I so choose.  I intend to fence my backyard in during the coming year to add a little extra security and to give a safe place for my dogs to play, but for now the shed is more than enuff.  The dolls are more than enuff too; indeed, I couldn't look at the box of new dolls without smiling.  So I send sincere thanks to Tam and to my mama for their incredible kindness, and to God above for putting such people in my life!  Thank you, all of you.

Much love,

RagingMoon1987 

Just for the heckuvit, a very long discussion on talking dolls

This post is going to be a "just for the heckuvit" post, as I don't see much online about the history of talking dolls.  I'm not proclaiming myself as an expert on anything mentioned here in this post.  This is just something I wanted to put together, both to educate and entertain myself and hopefully do the same for y'all.  It is by no means an exhaustive research of the talkers in this world, but...well, hopefully y'all will learn something like I did.  This post is probably the longest one I've done, so fasten your seat belts, grab something to eat, and keep the eyedrops at the ready.

YOU SPIN ME RIGHT 'ROUND, BABY
As far as I know, the first talking dolls ran on internal records.  Most modern sources will attest that Thomas Edison was the first to create a talking doll, one similar in appearance to the French Jumeaux and the German Armand Marseilles that I love a little too much.  The dolls had a metal body with a crank-operated phonograph inside, and their sounds were so distorted that even Edison himself wasn't thrilled with the product.  The Edison talkers had metal bodies and pretty little faces, but their talking mechanisms were fragile and the dolls themselves were ridiculously expensive.  They were not a success, but the idea of a talking doll was now alive and well.  Jumeau had talkers, but I don't know how widely available they were since French dolls were EXPENSIVE back then, just like they are now.  This image comes from Carl Fox's lovely book The Doll and shows two bisque-headed bebes.  One is showing her talking mechanism, which appears to be an old-style phonograph.

Carl Fox notes in the commentary for this image that one of the phrases uttered by these dolls is "Good day, my dear little mother."  That's all well and good, but being Jumeaux meant that these dolls were out of reach for everyone except the rich, and I don't even know how popular these talkers were.  If they shrieked their phrases like the Edison talkers did, most buyers probably stayed away.  Most of the sources I've found list Mae Starr as the first widely available (and popular) talking doll.  Mae Starr is a large composition doll from the one and only Effanbee, and like the Edison talkers and the Jumeau bebes she uses a phonograph to talk.  The following photo is used with the kind permission of Dawn, from the Etsy shop CaughtInTime77.  Her lovely young lady is available for sale, as are several other nice composition and vinyl dolls.

Mae's phonograph is in her chest, and the crank for winding her up is out of sight under one of her arms.  The records powering Mae Starr, the Edison dolls, and the Jumeau bebes are not flat disks like we're used to seeing, but rather squat little cylinders (the doll above is holding one in her lap).  Put the cylinder in Mae's chest, wind her up, and she is capable of talking, singing, or praying.  She recited simple things that children of the era would be familiar with, like "Old Mother Hubbard," "Rock-a-Bye Baby," and "Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep."  The doll above sings "London Bridge," according to the description.  Mae Starr is surprisingly hard to find nowadays, which is surprising considering her popularity in the 1920's, but the ones that do turn up are usually very well kept and can still talk if they have any of their records.  Similar to Mae Starr is Dolly Rekord, whom I unfortunately know very little about.  I do know that both Dolly and Mae have the same phonograph mechanism, and they both use the same type of record, though I don't know if they could share back and forth.  In fact, I think that Dolly Rekord predates Mae Starr a little, but I'm not sure on that either.  I've seen more Mae Starr dolls for sale than Dolly Rekord, so maybe one was more popular than the other?  I dunno.  Maybe I'm just not looking in the right places.

As we'll discuss in a bit, record dolls fell out of favor as the century progressed, but they weren't a total thing of the past in the sixties, as Charmin' Chatty shows.  Again, this Charmin' is not mine; this picture belongs to Janet Madrigal, proprietor of JanetsatticBoutique.  This young lady has since sold, but Charmin' Chatty isn't terribly hard to find.

Charmin' Chatty was a late addition to the Chatty Cathy family, and she sported a different mechanism from her smaller companions.  Well, she sort of did.  She had a pull string to activate her talking mech, the way many talkers of the sixties did, but inside her body was a phonograph player with switchable records, which was quite different from Chatty Cathy's fully internalized mech.  Charmin' came with five double-sided records that had twelve phrases apiece.  This gave her a hundred twenty things to say, which was more than triple the phrases that the original Chatty Cathy could say.  As with Mae Starr and Dolly Rekord the phrases were simple, kid-friendly things like proverbs, jokes, spooky stories, and animal sounds.  Charmin' had a short run, and there's not a lot out there about her, but I was at least able to find a commercial.  Tam has a little more info, as Charmin' had a slot in her A Doll A Day series a few years back.  I don't know what Confessions of a Dolly Lover would do without Tam's blog serving as a reference, y'all!  Charmin' also has something in common with more modern talkers like Amazing Ally and Amazing Maddie:  her outfits came with new records, which expanded her vocabulary.  One of her outfits had a shopping theme, and one of the phrases on the accompanying record was "Shall we buy a Barbie doll?"  Smooth move, Mattel.

The last record doll that I can name is another Mattel product, Best Friend Cynthia, not to be confused with Angelica Pickles's doll (LOL).  This time I didn't have to ask permission to use a picture, as this Cynthia is mine!  I hope I look as good as she does when I'm her age!

Tall, pretty Cynthia is like Barbie on steroids, at least in terms of looks and height.  I also threw in an American Girl for further size reference (and for shizzles, LOL).  Cynthia is a big girl, y'all!

My Cynthia no longer talks, but y'all can get an idea of how she worked.  Her back opens for batteries, NOT a pull string like Charmin' Chatty had.  Notice that my doll does not have her internal hardware, thus why I can't make her talk even though she has one of her records.  This record is labeled "indoor activities."

Her records slide into her torso under her left arm, like so.

Her dress has a slit to accommodate the records, kinda like Felicity's dresses have slits for her to reach into her pocket.

Apparently Cynthia's mech operated by pushing a button, because that's what she's got, in the middle of her back.

Here's her speaker, in her belly.

Cynthia could apparently share clothes with Ideal's Harmony, so I may have to take a look at that in a future Dolly Dress Discussion.  Anyway, Tam notes that Mattel took a "giant" step backwards with Cynthia, since most talking dolls were activated with pull strings by 1971 and did NOT utilize external records.  Cynthia also was not as verbose, as she only had thirty-six phrases as opposed to Charmin' Chatty's one hundred twenty.  But like Amazing Ally, Amazing Maddie, and Charmin' Chatty, her vocabulary could be increased with new outfits, each of which included a new record.  It would be interesting to find out Mattel's reasoning behind putting out a doll with outdated technology, but heck, all of the dolls in this post could be considered outdated with dolls like Ask Amy making their appearance!  For a more thorough review of Cynthia, check out Tam's post here, and go here for a sound byte.  

"MAMA" DOLLS
"Mama" dolls are composition dolls who holler "MAMA!!!" if squeezed or tipped over, and like the phonograph dolls they're nothing new.  Madame Hendren, the company that provided the mechanism for Dolly Rekord and Mae Starr, also provided the mech for these composition talkers.  Granted, the dolls only ever said "Mama," but that's still talking!  Mama dolls were affordable and popular, enough so that Doll Reference credits them with putting an end to the few remaining bisque doll lines.  Almost every company of the day, big and small, made "Mama" dolls, and not all of them are marked.  By the luck of the draw I may have three of these, all composition, all Horsman, all babies.  

Neither Sally, Lili Marlene, nor Anita make noise now, but if I palpate their chests I can feel their crying mechanisms.  I'm not sure if these are "Mama" dolls or if they just cried when tipped over, but either way they made some kind of noise.  This kind of mechanism is repairable, but one will have to dismantle the doll in order to do it, something that I'll leave to a professional.  I can't say too much about these since there's not a lot to them, but they were so popular that I figured I'd touch on them.

MY NAME IS TALKY TINA, AND I'M GOING TO KILL YOU
By the late 1950s record dolls were out for the most part and pull-string dolls were in.  Probably the best known example of a pull-string talker is also one of the first:  Chatty Cathy.  Poor love, my example could do with a new face-up.

I solemnly swear that my Cathy has her original dress.  She just looks so pretty in blue that I've left her in the dress Mama got for her some years ago.  Anywho, Chatty Cathy was THE ONE TO HAVE for the early part of the sixties.  I fudge a little bit when I say that she's a pull-string doll and not a record doll since she does have a phonograph in her chest, but her records couldn't be switched around like Charmin' Chatty's could.  Her cord sticks out of her upper back...

...and since my doll is a first-issue doll, her speaker is covered with a patch of flesh-colored fabric.  Later dolls had a grill-type chest plate.

Usually first-issue dolls are the most valuable (like Barbie), but with Chatty Cathy the exact opposite is true, as there were A LOT of these first-issue dolls made.  These early dolls had eleven random phrases that were activated by the pull string.  The phrases consisted of typical dolly prattle like "Will you play with me?," "Let's play 'House,'" and "I hurt myself!"  Uh...I HURT MYSELF???  Yeah, we all know that real kids skin knees and cut fingers sometimes, but is that really what anyone wanted to hear from a doll???  Anywho, later dolls had eighteen phrases, and they varied quite a bit.  They didn't all say "I hurt myself," for example, and though one of her more famous phrases was "Will you play with me?" not all of them said that either.  Indeed, the only phrase that every Anglophone Chatty Cathy uttered was "I love you."  Other countries had dolls that spoke in other languages, and Cathy's British and German selves were adorable!  The British doll was called "Rosebud" rather than "Cathy," while the ones who spoke French called themselves "Caroline."  Regardless of what she said or what language she spoke, Chatty Cathy was a huge seller and became Mattel's second-most popular doll after Barbie.  She underwent several cosmetic changes over the years and was popular enough to inspire murderous little Talky Tina in the Twilight Zone episode "Living Doll."

Talky Tina was a customized amalgamation of Vogue's Brikette and Ideal's Saucy Walker, neither of whom were talkers.  Tina's talking "mechanism" was activated in a way that I don't oft see, at least for talkers.  In this clip we can see Erich Streator, the object of Tina's wrath, winding her up.  Such a mechanism is pretty common for walkers and for music box dolls, but I can't say as I know of many talkers that wound up.  But then again, I don't know of many dolls that commit murder either, not in this world.  Oh well, anything is possible in Hollywood!  As an aside, "Living Doll," a spoof of Chatty Cathy, was itself spoofed in The Simpsons, during a Treehouse of Horror special.  Leave it to the Simpsons to spoof a spoof!

Alrighty, I've established that Chatty Cathy was a popular doll who set the paces for talkers of the 1960's.  In 1961 she was joined by "friends" Matty Mattel, Sister Belle, and Casper the Friendly Ghost.  Pardon the grainy YouTube screenshot.

Matty, Sister Belle, and Casper were soft dolls like Raggedy Ann, but they had the same talk mechanism inside that Chatty Cathy did, pull string and all.  June Foray voiced the three dolls, just as she did for Chatty Cathy and Talky Tina.  Like Miss Cathy, the three dolls had eleven different phrases.  I like Matty's the best since they sound like pastimes I enjoyed when I was a kid.  One of his phrases, which can be heard in the commercial is "Let's play 'Cowboy.'"  Oh man, I loved to play "Cowboy" when I was a little girl!  Had a stick horse and a red felt cowboy hat and everything.  Casper made frequent references to his status as a ghost, even inviting his owner to play "Ghost," another game that I would've liked as a kid.  As for Sister Belle, well...I'll let y'all hear her for yourselves.

Yep, that Sister Belle is mine, just like Best Friend Cynthia is.  My mom isn't a big fan of Sister Belle, LOL.

Justine-Marie seems to like her okay...

...but Suzie is a little freaked out by Sister Belle's ability to talk, so maybe Mama is on to something after all. 

Y'all can probably see Sister Belle's pull ring, sticking out of the right side of her neck.  Why it's in a different position from Chatty Cathy's is anyone's guess.

Mattel placed Sister Belle's talking mech in her head, which I think is smart since her soft body would've offered very little protection for her mech.  Like Chatty Cathy, Sister Belle says eleven things, and she said some of the same things.  So far my doll has said ten of her possible phrases:

*I love you.
*Let's play "House."
*I'm glad we're friends.
*Let's draw pictures.
*Please take me with you.
*Do you like me?
*It's time to eat.
*Sing me a song.
*I think you're nice.
*Will you play with me? 

I think the eleventh phrase is "I'm Sister Belle," but my doll hasn't said that yet.  LOL, I've had her since May 24th and she STILL hasn't said it!  I admit that "I'm glad we're friends" brought a smile to my face, because everyone likes to hear that regardless of age.  Sister Belle's voice is rough, squeaky, and indistinct now, and it's deteriorated some in the time that I've owned her, but she does still talk and I am very glad of it.  

Mattel didn't forget Chatty Cathy, of course.  In 1962 she her family grew to include Chatty Baby, with twins Tiny Chatty Baby and Tiny Chatty Brother and the aforementioned Charmin' Chatty appearing in 1963.  Cathy's last sibling to arrive was the nightingale of the family, Singin' Chatty.  With the exception of Charmin', all of these dolls had fully internal talk boxes that were activated by a string, and they all wore out with time.  Indeed, I've run into a great many of these dolls over the years, and I've never even once found one that still talks, thus why I was so pleased to find a Sister Belle doll that still works.  Luckily these dolls are easily repaired, provided you send them to someone who knows what they're doing!  

But Mattel isn't done.  Whaaaaaat, did y'all seriously think we'd get through this post without bringing Barbie into the mix???  No, Barbie has had a lot to say since she uttered her first words in 1968, and she'll be popping into this post a lot in the next few segments.  I should probably admit that I don't have an original Talking Barbie, but I do have New 'n' Groovy Talking P.J.  

My P.J. is not wearing her original outfit at the moment (I have it safely tucked away), and she doesn't talk anymore, but she does still have her pull string (Some of these dolls do not have their string intact).  Instead of the finger loop sported by Chatty Cathy and Sister Belle, she's got a daisy sticking out of her neck.

Yes, Barbie and P.J. talked, as did Stacey, Christie, Ken, Steffie, and Julia.  I have a full script of P.J.'s phrases in an old issue of Barbie Bazaar, but God only knows where that magazine is.  YouTube has a sound byte from a repaired doll, so that's something.

I can't talk about pull-string dolls without discussing one of my favorites.  Scooba-Doo was another Mattel product, and a fairly obscure one at that.  She hit store shelves in 1964.

Yep, y'all read that right.  She's Scooba-Doo, not to be confused with Scooby Doo, whom I loathe.  Seriously, I'd like to punch Velma in the throat, and I still feel that way now, even after the left tried to destroy her.  But Scooba-Doo?  She's a freakin' BEATNIK!!!  She talks and sings, if you want to call her racket singing.  I guess it classifies as scat-singing, which can be tremendously fun to listen to when it's done right, as Steven Tyler demonstrates at the end of "Rag Doll."  Anyway, Scoob scat-sings and talks, and her phrases are nothing like Chatty Cathy's or Sister Belle's.  She never hurt herself like Chatty Cathy and Matty Mattel did, for example (LOL), and she likes...no, she DIGS food.  I think my favorite phrase of Scoob's is a reference to her permanently attached black tights:  "Dig my CRAZY black stockings!"  I dig 'em, sweetie!  I used to wear black tights myself once, back when my legs were slightly smaller than thunder.

Mattel had other talkers, mostly babies and these weird little goobers called Talk Ups, but I'll just talk about just one more before moving on.  Baby See 'n' Say, Baby Secret and Teenie Talk all had mouths that move.  Case in point:

As I established in that clip, this is Baby Teenie Talk; Baby Secret looked a lot like her.  These three dolls have that same slack-jawed expression that Amazing Maddie and Snackin' Sara have, and yet they're pull-string dolls just like the ones above.  Baby Secret speaks in a whispering tone that can sound a bit creepy, even to a seasoned doll collector like me, so it's probably just as well that I went with Teenie instead.  Speaking of creepy, if any of y'all are in the mood for some Annabelle-type humor, this parody of Baby Secret's commercial is a riot.  Of course my little doll doesn't say "Daddy's pills taste like candy," but she does look a lot like Baby Secret in the face, and both dolls look a little cross.  I have a strange feeling that when I pull her string Teenie is going to say "You know what?  You really suck."

Maybe she's wondering where her missing hair plugs went, or why Tommy keeps photobombing.

Crazy ol' Tommy's always gotta be where the action is.  Sometimes that's cute and sometimes that's...not so cute, like when Tommy nommed on Lindsay's boot...a day after I'd gotten her.  Now the paint is peeling off and I'm gonna have to go over it.  I was so mad that I almost yelled "I HOPE THAT PAINT IS TOXIC!!!"  The little a-hole chewed on Sister Belle too, too the point that Belle now has a hole in her foot.  Sister Belle is unfazed by this injury, but I think she may admire and even envy Teenie Talk's clearer voice and moving mouth.  In fact, I have a feeling that they're plotting something devious.  Either that or Teenie is wondering why Sister Belle has a hair bow and she doesn't.

"I like that!  Where'd you get it?"

I've since fixed Teenie's hair and added in her very own bow, but I digress.  Guess what one of Teenie's phrases is?  "I hurt my finger."  Good grief, were Mattel's talkers a bunch of klutzes or what???  Chatty Cathy hurt herself too at some point, and so did Matty Mattel.  Teenie's phrases are more distinct than Sister Belle's are, but some of them trail off before finishing.  The "I hurt my finger" phrase is one of these; she starts to say "please" before petering out.  Luckily this video fills in the blank:  "I hurt my finger.  Please kiss it for me."  I also like "Hide your eyes...peek-a-boo!"  "Peek-a-boo" was a game I liked when I was super-little, and I still like to play it with any baby that comes into the library.

Before I move away from Mattel for a bit, look who's on Teenie Talk's tag.

That's Matty Mattel, kiddies!  Not only was he one of Mattel's dolls, but he was also Mattel's mascot for many, many years.  I think he was the mascot before he was one of their dolls, in fact.  I even remember seeing him in some inconspicuous place on Mattel packaging when I was a kid and wondering "Who's that and why is he there?"  Now I know.  This article discusses a few other Mattel dolls that talked during the 1960's, and a diverse lot they were!

Of course Mattel wasn't the only toy company to make pull-string talkers!  1971 saw the birth of a very special doll, Talking Tamu.

Tamu came from a then-new toy company called Shindana Toys.  She was not Shindana's first doll, but she was their first that talked.  She could cry and laugh, and her other phrases were things like "My name is Tamu," "Tamu means 'sweet,'" "Can you dig it?," "I'm proud, like you," and my favorite phrase, "Cool it, baby."  LOL, I heard "Cool it!" a lot when I was a kid, and I often yell it at my cats when they start to bicker (again, Tommy usually is the instigator).  I can't do much more than scratch the surface of Tamu without owning her, so here's Debbie Behan Garrett's post about her, and here's a recording of the phrases she said.  I freaking love this doll, by the way!  I don't have her yet, but I'm keeping my eyes peeled, just like I am for Scooba-Doo. 

Ideal also made pull-string talkers in 1971, namely variations of these two.

My Crissy and Velvet are the Look Around variety rather than the Talky variety, but as I stated in Crissy's review I like the talking gimmick better than the "look around" gimmick.  Velvet had six phrases, while Crissy originally had twelve.  Later Talky Crissy dolls had six or seven phrases (scroll down to 1971 if you click the link), and once in a blue moon one might find a Talky Velvet with seven phrases.  Twelve-phrase Talky Crissy made a bunch of hair-related comments, as well as a thinly-veiled advertisement for Velvet ("Velvet talks too!").  Six-phrase Crissy offered more relevant chatter, mainly responses to any questions or secrets that little girls might have for her.  As far as I know, Cinnamon never talked, nor did any of Crissy's friends or Velvet's friends.

Before I move on, I want to pay some kudos to Miss Debbie for the advice she gave in this post about her Chatty Cathy dolls.  She says that if you have a pull-string talker it's best to activate them once in awhile to keep their mechanisms from deteriorating.  It's too late for my Chatty Cathy, but it's not too late for Sister Belle and Teenie Talk.  Every morning and every evening I pick them up and pull their strings, and Sister Belle ask me to sing to her or take her with me.  Sorry, Sister Belle, but no more dolls at the library.  And you don't want to hear me sing.  "Slide Zone" does not sound great when sung in a Southern accent, LOL.

I HATE TECHNOLOGY!!!
Well, no I actually don't (unlike Patchy the Pirate), but I needed an opener for this next segment because talking dolls of the eighties got VERY technical.  Perhaps the best example of this was Julie.  If this is your picture let me know and I'll credit you.

Most of the Julie dolls I've seen don't look a thing like the pretty little poppet in her commercial.  Indeed, I think Julie is a little creepy, and that's saying a lot because creepy dolls don't usually bother me.  To be fair, I think Teddy Ruxpin is creepy too, which makes no sense because I don't think the puppets in Welcome to Pooh Corner were creepy.  Some folks did, LOL.  Creepy or no, Julie was very unique among dolls in general and talking dolls in particular.  Not only did her face move in tandem with her words like Baby Secret's face did, but she responded to external stimuli like temperature, light, and certain words.  Her mouth opened and closed, her eyes blinked, and she could "read" story books via sensors in her fingertips and in the specially constructed story books.  One could also "teach" her to listen to other voices by pressing a very, VERY small button in her back, and I think one could also expand her vocab with outfits.  The interesting thing about Julie is that she didn't rely on an internal phonograph or a pull string, but rather these cartridges that looked a lot like the old-timey cassette tapes.  Julie had a slot on her back to accommodate these.  These cards aren't mandatory to get Julie to talk, but they do add significantly to her play value, kinda like Charmin' Chatty's records did.

Worlds of Wonder made a great many talking toys, mostly stuff that ran on cassette tape like Teddy Ruxpin, Mickey Mouse, and Mother Goose.  As far as I know, the only noteworthy dolls were Julie and her predecessor, Pamela.  Pamela wasn't quite as advanced as Julie was, as her face didn't move and her sensors had to be activated by touch, but that's still a lot more than Chatty Cathy and Mae Starr could do!  Pamela ran on a similar mechanism to Julie, with cartridges that went into her back.

Coleco also got in on the talking act before Cabbage Patch Fever fully cooled down.  The Talking Kids were kinda like Julie and Pamela in that they could interact with their accessories and to a certain extent with each other.  Their mouths moved like the Snacktime Kids' mouths did.  There's not much else to say about them, as they're just...Cabbage Patch Kids that talked.  There are a few running around on eBay, but they're ridiculously expensive, especially for a Cabbage Patch Kid.

Of course a lot of these eighties dolls need something to power them, and that brings us to...

BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED
Most of the talkers during the nineties were Barbie and Barbie-type dolls, or they were baby dolls that played Ring-Around-the-Rosie, caught colds, jumped on trampolines, or peed their pants.  Oh, how I HATED Potty Dotty!!!  I don't know why, but I hated her.  Anyway, I didn't play with dolls during my childhood so I don't remember much about the decade's earlier talking Barbie dolls, but I do remember the commercial for Super Talk Barbie (year was 1994), and being floored when the voiceover said she could say over a hundred thousand things.  LOL, I remember joking to Daddy that this particular Barbie and I would be good friends, since at the time I didn't have an off switch.  I don't yet own Super Talk Barbie, but she shows how far Mattel came in three short years.  One of her predecessors, 1991's Teen Talk Barbie, said only four things.  There was a list of...I think it was thirty-six phrases, but each doll only said four.  My mistake, there were 270 possible phrases, WAY more than thirty-six, LOL!  My doll was sent with fresh batteries and thus talks perfectly.

Yep, this is the one that said "Math class is tough," and darn straight it was!  But as they love to do, the feminists all had a collective stroke over Barbie's admission that not everything comes easily to her.  As a result Mattel discontinued the phrase and offered a trade to anyone who had a doll that said the phrase.  The whole mess was spoofed in another Simpsons episode, "Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy."  Perhaps the feminists should've been glad that Barbie didn't say "Math class sucks," like I did plenty of times during my high school years.  My particular doll has no reference whatsoever to math class, and it's probably just as well since dolls that say "Math class is tough" are now collectors' items and thus expensive.  My doll says the following four phrases:

*Help me pick out a new car.
*Who's your favorite rock star?
*Let's plan a ski trip.
*Music makes me feel great!

Who's my favorite rock star?  Depends on which decade of development I was in:
16-year old me:  I LOVE ELTON JOHN!!!
22-year old me:  ROGER DALTREY IS A HOTTIE!!!
33-year old me:  JOHN LODGE FOR THE WIN!!!

I doubt Barbie would know who any of those men are, but one can always pretend, right?  As for the new car, this chick is totally getting a Beetle, the car that I always wanted for Barbie.  The green one was my favorite, but my doll will likely get the blue one since it matches what she's wearing.

Super Talk Barbie is likely the most verbose Barbie doll we'll ever see, but she is by no means Mattel's last.  Dentist Barbie, Dorothy and Glenda, the riotously funny Talk With Me Barbie and Chat Divas, and Hello Barbie are some notable examples.  I owned Dentist Barbie for a short time during my teenage years, and she said dentist-flavored things like "Let's floss," and "Great checkup," plus mechanical, dentisty sound effects.  Shudder...I know we need dentists in this world, and I love my personal dentist, but does ANYONE like going to the dentist, even if they like their dentist???  Furthermore, when's the last time any of y'all saw your dentist wearing high heels in the office?  Yee-ouchie!  But then again, one of the ladies at my vet's office wears high heels and seems to do just fine.  LOL, I never will forget the sight of her in rainbow high heels, cradling my puppies in her hands and kissing them after they had their first round of shots!  Anyway, the Talk With Me dolls and the Chat Divas are hilarious because their mouths moved, similarly to Teenie Talk and Amazing Ally, and as a result they came out looking a little like Julia "Duck Lips" Roberts.  On the other hand, the Chat Divas talked, sang, and interacted with their accessories, making their goofy mouths a little easier to ignore.  Hello Barbie got even more technical than that, enough so that she belongs in the next segment.  I'll get to that in the next segment, but I can't really do it without discussing Mattel's non-Barbie, millennial group of talkers.

TALKING OUT OF TURN
Oh, the Diva Starz.  When the line was young they looked like this.  From left, they are Summer, Alexa, Tia, and Nikki.  Summer was later replaced by another blonde, named Miranda.

Betcha y'all can't guess which one my favorite was, with my love of red hair!  I liked the Diva Starz enough to voice a passing interest in them, but in the end they had too many bells and whistles.  Plus I was afraid that they didn't have an off-switch, like Furby.  Truthfully the dolls were kinda dumb-looking with their huge Blythe-sized eyes and heads, but they did have a significant amount of play value.  Their heads turned, their eyes blinked, and their lips flashed when they spoke.  According to their commercials these dolls could "feel" when their hair was being brushed, and they could interact with their accessories that plugged into their bodies.  They could also talk to their owners to a certain extent, with help from the flower buttons on their shoes.  With Miranda's introduction the dolls became your more traditional fashion doll, but they still talked.  Here's what Miranda looks like.

When Jenny and Emiko modeled a Diva Starz outfit I never dreamed I'd be owning one of the dolls, but I do now.  Now I have to dig that outfit out and put it with Miranda's stuff!  Miranda also fell victim to Tommy's lousy little teeth (two minutes after I unboxed her), but I stopped his baloney before he could do any damage.  Anyway, Miranda's lips light up like the robotic dolls' lips do, and she's activated by a button under the "skin" on the top of her head.  Her eyes look like they blink, but they don't.

Like Teen Talk Barbie, she speaks four phrases:

*Glow get 'em, girlfriend!

*Get real!

*Lights out, it's time to glow!

*Which dude is paging me now?

I'm not 100% certain about that last one, but that's what she sounds like she's saying.  Hmmm...where were the feminists when that phrase came out???  Anyway, these fashion dolls are nowhere near as advanced as the robotic Diva Starz were, and thus they don't interact with each other or with their owner.  Even then the conversation could devolve into jibberish with one doll talking to herself and the other singing, like Tia and Summer did here.  But not all conversations went bananas; in this video Alexa and Nikki communicate with no trouble.

Alrighty, that was Mattel's anti-Barbie.  Now...who is the millennial anti-Barbie that EVERYONE remembers???

Before the first decade of the new millennium was out the Bratz talked, and they were similar to the Diva Starz in that they could respond to some of your responses with buttons or yes/no cues.  Unfortunately the Talking Bratz appear to have been partially (or wholly) static like the Diva Starz were.

There were also genies, and their positions are different but they look the same otherwise.  Even though I hate modern/semi-modern pop music, I couldn't help humming "Genie in a Bottle" when I saw these.

These dolls apparently can come off their base, but it looks like their legs are stuck in their show-offy stances.  I'll stick with my non-talkers, thanks.  While MGA was piddling with the Bratz, Playmates Toys was releasing a whole line of interactive dolls, most of them with the title "amazing" attached.  I own Amazing Maddie from this line, and I had hoped to have her review done by now, but...no.  This is what she looks like.

Like the Bratz and the Diva Starz Maddie and her Amazing friends can interact with their owners via the pressing of buttons.  She's not as technical as Julie, in other words; Julie can recognize external stimuli to a certain degree, but the only way I can talk to Maddie is through her buttons.  

In theory I could also use Maddie's "creative padd," as she calls it.  This is actually what the manufacturers intended.  Maddie has a port on her left wrist...

...and this is where the cord to the creative padd hooks in.  The creative padd is this reddish thing with six little buttons inside. 

Maddie came with several cards, and each card slides into the top of the creative padd.  There are things for setting the date and time, as well as other odds and ends.  Here's where I run into problems, as her mechanism is a little hard to handle.  I'm not sure if the cards in her "creative padd" came warped or if that occurred with age, but either way the prompts don't always work when I punch the buttons.  One of Maddie's phrases is "Bummeroo," and usually when she says that it's because her creative padd can't read the card that's inside it.

See the warping?  I blame that for Maddie's inability to consistently read my prompts, but maybe it was always that way.  I dunno.  My point is that like some Julie dolls Maddie and Ally are glitchy.  I'm not sure about the rest of the Amazing line since they didn't rely on cards, but maybe they have the same problems.  Ally and Maddie took a page out of Julie's book in that their mouths move when they talk, and Allysen took it a step further.  Her eyes blink, her eyebrows move, and her mouth can change from a smile to a frown.  She's a little on the wrong side of Uncanny Valley for some folks, but she's got a cute face!

Maddie is a little quirky even when I do get her creative padd to work, as she sometimes likes to spout random phrases that have nothing to do with what we were initially talking about.  I haven't tested Allysen yet because I don't have Allysen yet, but I figure she'll do the same...or maybe not.  Maybe all the bugs Ally and Maddie had were worked out with Allysen, just like later issues of Julie had fewer glitches.

Last in this section, Hello Barbie.

Until I read this article, I thought Hello Barbie was just another Barbie that talked, minus the moving jaws of the Chat Divas, and without the cumbersome PC connection that Talk With Me Barbie required.  No, this Barbie looks like your typical dopey blonde Barbie, the kind that says "Hiiiiiiiiiii, everyone!" like Big Bird (no offense meant to Big Bird, who I still think is awesome).

Not so fast there, Moon.  Hello Barbie has an internalized WiFi connection that must be connected to an app (usually on Mom or Dad's cell phone).  She requires charging when her batteries run low, but when she's charged she can respond to her owner with one of eight thousand preprogramed phrases.  Eight thousand?  That's pretty wimpy compared to Super Talk Barbie's one hundred thousand phrases.  And unfortunately, there was a catch, as some parents and consumers worried about Big Brother problems.

WHERE WE ARE TODAY
All of the above dolls appear to have set the stage for this young lady, Ask Amy, from World of Magic Toys.

Somber-looking little goober, isn't she?  What I've read and heard about Amy is largely heresay, but folks are saying that Amy is the most advanced doll available...unless you count those robotic RealDolls, and those are NOT toys for kids.  Seriously, those darn things remind me of an episode of The Twilight Zone, something like "The Lonely."  Anyway, according to her website Amy can laugh, cry, talk, sing, and go to sleep.  She knows when you've got her upside-down.  She can answer questions, turn her head, move her eyes, and apparently her lips as well.  Hmmm...those lips don't look like lips that can move.

But sure enuff, there are videos on YouTube that show this doll's mouth moving.  Amy's speech is largely free of the slang that Maddie seems quite fond of, adding evidence to World of Magic Toys' claim that Amy is an educational tool as well as a toy.  Does that mean that Amy will be doing the frustrating task of teaching her owner multiplication???  Unfortunately, no, but reciting poetry is a good skill to learn too, particularly if one has a teacher who's big on that thing (I had a few like that).  These dolls can apparently do just that; the one in the green shirt reportedly knows eight songs and six poems, and while she doesn't teach multiplication she does sing songs about math and the alphabet.  And by Jove, she knows the old nursery rhymes that I loved when I was little.  Cool...I may have to grab one of these dolls for myself and see how good she is.  I wonder if I'll have to teach her to recognize my voice, like I'd have to do with Julie.  Pricing for Amy is...fairly reasonable.  She's bigger than an American Girl, and she does more things than an American Girl can, but the prices are about the same.  Not cheap, mind you, but not outrageous like Edison's early talkers were.  And as far as I know she can't be used for nefarious purposes like Hello Barbie could.

Outrageously priced or no, Edison's talkers may not have been the biggest sellers on the planet, but they certainly set the paces for the next century.  This post is absolutely not a comprehensive list of talking dolls; to do that would take years and a lot of research, and I'm too lazy to do all that.  But hopefully I've entertained y'all and presented some sort of information that might come in handy for your own collections.  Now I'm gonna try and get Amazing Maddie's review done!  She should be up on September 16th, if all goes well and life doesn't happen.  Let me know if there's someone I missed that you think should be here!

Happy reading,
RagingMoon1987