This one is another post inspired by YouTube; I'm always on YouTube, so I may make this a series. Anyway, during one of my nightly YouTube benders I found this video about twenty-four dolls from the sixyies and seventies that might be considered odd, either back then or now. I thought it was interesting and decided to issue my opinions, because my opinions are SOOOOOOO important! The video can be found here, and spoilers: some of 'em aren't that weird in my book. Kinda like...
ROCK FLOWERS
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1971-1973
Rock Flowers were kinda Mattel's answer to Dawn, small dollhouse-sized dolls that wore bright, trendy-for-the-era clothes, bent their arms and legs, and danced on record players. The dolls were music-themed and came with their own records, but otherwise they look pretty innocent to me. The narrator wasn't a big fan of how their doll smelled, and the doll wouldn't sit up for tea parties either. Legit gripes, both of those. One of my "scented" dolls stunk up her whole box, and I HATE it when I want my dolls to sit up and they won't. The narrator also critiqued the Rock Flowers' staring eyes, and I think that critique IS dumb because all dolls stare. Smart Dolls, Mumpy Terri Lee, Cabbage Patch Kids, American Girls, Barbie, they all stare.
WEIRD FACTOR: 2 out of 10. I don't really find these weird at all, in fact. They're dated a bit, yes, but then so are many dolls of this era. My review on Heather can be seen here.
DUSTY/SKYE
COMPANY: Kenner
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1974
Dusty and her friend Skye were sports-themed dolls, apparently designed to get girls active. The duo could ski, play golf, and play tennis. The narrator says that when their friend's Dusty did ski she made a "nails on a chalkboard" noise. They also weren't in love with the dolls' faces...or their hair, or their clothes. Dusty and Skye apparently had nice sets of joints, but those joints cracked louder than my knees do when I'm struggling to stand. I wouldn't have liked that as a kid; when a doll's joint cracked too loud I was immediately afraid that I'd broken something.
WEIRD FACTOR: 6 out of 10. I can only presume that Dusty and Skye were created to attract boys and tomboys...kids that don't usually play with dolls, period, even if the doll in question is sports-themed. If my presumption is correct then the gimmick fell flat right out of the gate. I personally also find the duo homely, and I know I'm not the only one who feels that way. Tomboys aren't always plain of face, though they are often depicted as such. Tam discusses Dusty here and Skye here.
JODY
COMPANY: Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1975
Copper topped Jody, also called Jody the Country Girl, this doll represented country life in the Victorian era. Kinda fitting, since Little House on the Prairie was big back then. Once again, the narrator said their Jody smelled funny, had stiff hair, and stared. She also could apparently look pretty menacing when wielding a pitchfork. I personally love her period-accurate accessories, though, especially her old-timey wall-mount telephone.
WEIRD FACTOR: 3 out of 10. Country living was kinda a thing in the seventies, and it still is to some extent today. The only thing I don't really like about Jody is her skirt, which is impractically long for country life. But then again, she does represent an era where skirts WERE that long. Like the Rock Flowers, Jody is a hair dated, but that's all. Tam also has featured this doll on her blog.
SMARTY PANTS
COMPANY: Topper
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1971
This one is one I wasn't familiar with, and I'm already not in love with the name. "Smarty pants" is usually thrown around in a derogatory manner. I'd have liked the trivia factor, though. Yes, Smarty asked trivia questions, and if you got it right she'd congratulate you. The narrator called her "bossy" and stated that Smarty was not the most cuddly thing. Worse, she asked multiplication questions, so that wouldn't have pleased me as a kid. Multiplication was the bane of my existence when I was Smarty's target age. Smarty also wore glasses that could throw light wrong, and she wasn't dressed very stylish like. As a result, the narrator said she looked like a "mean teacher." Oh, and guess where Smarty's batteries go??? Right up her butt!
WEIRD FACTOR: 5 out of 10. She's cute, but who wants to be asked questions when they're trying to relax and play? I don't, even if I do like trivia! I had a laugh at the battery placement, though.
SWINGY
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1968
Our resident Paul Revere and the Raiders fan! Swingy is a little go-go dancer, styled for the era, and I freaking love her. The poor love is quite noisy when she moves, though, and apparently her hair would get caught in her joints too. And guess what else? The narrator reported that Swingy smelled funny. Hell's bells, my mama's old Barbie smells funny too, kinda like crayons. I think that was the norm for dolls of the era, because that's how plastic was and still is.
WEIRD FACTOR: 1 out of 10. I don't find Swingy weird at all, but then I'm a bit biased because I like her.
CRISSY
COMPANY: Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1969-1974
Ah, Crissy, of whom I'm very fond. Crissy and company had hair that grew and could retract again, and if you were good with styling you could give her curls or updos or what-have-you. Unfortunately, Narrator reports that in addition to feeling nasty right out of the package, their Crissy's hair would break and they'd be left holding shanks of hair. Funny, I've not had that issue with my dolls' hair, but then I usually just braid it to avoid tangles. I wonder if Narrator's doll was one of the first issue dolls; Crissy and Beth says that that hair was different from the hair of later dolls. I've also gotta admit that pulling a doll's hair to make it grow sounds excruciating, but I can't think of any better way to get the hair out. Hardcore readers of my blog will remember my main gripe with Crissy: her eyes are ridiculously dark, darker even than the darkest American Girl eyes. Mia, one of Velvet's friends, has the exact opposite effect; her eyes are a smidge bright. And yet Mia is one of my favorites of the bunch due to her exuberant smile.
WEIRD FACTOR: Mmmm...4 out of 10, mostly for the eyes. Crissy's eyes are WAAAAY too dark. I might bump the Look Around variants up to 6 out of 10, as the "look around" feature is kinda creepy. Y'all can read my review of Crissy here; I also own two Velvets and a Cinnamon, and I'm keeping my eyes peeled for Tara. Tam has a few of these dolls too; indeed, one of my Velvets belonged to her!
THIRSTEE WALKER
COMPANY: Horsman
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1964
Yes, that is a screenshot, LOL. Several of these images are. Thirstee Walker walked, drank, and cried, which is admittedly an unusual combo of gimmicks. None of my walkers drink, for example. The water proved problematic, as it sloshed around, leaked from the doll in various unusual places, smelled stale, and undoubtedly caused the doll to mildew. I'd have kept water a million miles away from this gal.
WEIRD FACTOR: 6 out of 10. She looks innocent enuff, but why make a doll drink when she can't pee it back out???
CHEERFUL TEARFUL
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1965
Cheerful's name says it all: she could be happy or sad depending on how her arm was positioned. She could cry real tears like Thirstee Walker, but she had a pee hole so the water wouldn't build up inside and get icky. Like Dusty, Cheerful made a racket when her arm was moved, and sometimes she'd get stuck between happy and sad. The smaller variant, Tiny Cheerful Tearful, had sunken eyes that attract dust, throw funny shadows, and make the doll look sick. I'd know, because I own her! My review of Tiny Cheerful Tearful can be found here, and if you watch the video, you may notice that one of the pictures of Tiny looks familiar.
WEIRD FACTOR: 6 out of 10. That shifting face is admittedly a little freaky. Tiny Cheerful Tearful also looks a little ill with those hollow eyes.
BABY FIRST STEP
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1964
Another walker, though this young lady walks the same way Swingy dances: by shuffling her feet and swinging her arms. Like Swingy she's noisy when she walks, and the narrator claimed that this doll could spontaneously walk by herself. Knowing mechanical items like I do, there's probably some truth to that.
WEIRD FACTOR: 1 out of 10, just like Swingy. The two could be sisters, except that they don't look the same in the face. Tam has discussed this doll on her blog.
CHATTY CATHY
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1959-1965
Chatty Cathy? MY Chatty Cathy, weird? Well...if you ask my sister then she's worse than weird. Most doll fans are at least vaguely familiar with this doll, either because they lived in the era, because they saw the GEICO commercial, or because they like The Twilight Zone. As for weird...well, Cathy doesn't blink when she talks (most dolls don't), her mech made an ominous grinding sound when activated, and...yeah, I can see why some folks would be a bit weirded out by Chatty Cathy. Nonetheless, to date she is Mattel's second most popular doll, behind only Barbie.
WEIRD FACTOR: I'll give her a 5 out of 10. I've gotta admit that it's freaky how she stares and talks without blinking. To be fair, I don't like that about Amazing Maddie or my other talking dolls either. Furthermore, I always thought it was odd that some of these dolls declared "I hurt myself!" Another of my chatterboxes, Teenie Talk, says something similar, but she then asks me to kiss it, so it makes a bit more sense. Big surprise, Tam also has a few of these, and two of 'em have pigtails. I think the ones with pigtails are cute.
CHARMIN' CHATTY
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1963-1964
Chatty Cathy's sister of sorts, Charmin' relied on records to speak, and that right there is a smidge problematic. Fans of old vinyls know how records can get scratched, and when that happens they skip or repeat. This sometimes happened to Charmin' Chatty! She also was a little goofy in the face, to the point that some folks think she's ugly (I think she's hilarious). I will say that Charmin' isn't as quiz-kid as Smarty Pants is; one of her records has her making animal sounds, which kids love to do. So Charmin' had a goofy side.
WEIRD FACTOR: I'll give her a 4 out of 10, a little lower than Chatty Cathy. She doesn't blink when she talks either, but as I said above few dolls can do that. The skipping records are my main reason for her landing a 4. Once again, please take a look at Tam's doll. She's missing her glasses, but she's still cute.
TINY TEARS
COMPANY: American Character
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1950-1965
One of the more well-known vintage dolls, Tiny Tears is a crier and could wet her diapers as well. Narrator says that this doll's voice sounded too realistic at times (so do Cry Babies!) and that she'd go off at random sometimes. If not properly dried her tears would gather dust and make the poor poppet look unwell. Hmmm...I never had that problem with the handful of criers that I played with. She apparently also reeked after being fed.
WEIRD FACTOR: 2 out of 10. She's a crier, no worse than the Cry Babies of today, though as with Thirstee Walker I'd be concerned with mildew over time. Thus why I keep water away from Ayla and Kathy Cry Baby, even though they were meant to have water inside them. Tam has this one too, and hers is really cute.
BETSY WETSY
COMPANY: Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1937-1983, give or take
Killecrankie, I had no idea that Betsy Wetsy had been around that long! Narrator says that this doll retained water like Thirstee Walker (and probably Tiny Tears) did, and predictably that started to smell after awhile. Her hair could also turn green from the chlorine in the water. Interesting, I knew that could happen to polar bears, but apparently it can happen to dolls too! Narrator didn't add that unlike Tiny Tears, Betsy's nose runs when she cries, adding another orifice to be cleaned.
WEIRD FACTOR: 4 out of 10. She's a crier like Tiny Tears, but the runny nose bumps the weird factor up a bit. Yeah, we've all had a runny nose from time to time, but it's not a common feature on our dolls unless they're little sickies, which Betsy is not.
BABY ALIVE
COMPANY: Kenner
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1973-present day (sort of)
We're talking the original one here! Baby Alive is still very much alive in the present day, but boy howdy, has she changed! Y'all have seen my little trio, and they look nothing like the doll of the seventies.
WEIRD FACTOR: 6 out of 10 for a doll that eats colored sludge and calls it food. Even Snackin' Sara's Play-Doh turdlets looked more like something a doll could eat.
FLATSIES
COMPANY: Ideal
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1969-1973
Flatsies, Flatsies, they're flat and that's that! I thought that these dolls were...well, flat, but it turns out that there's more to them than that. Flatsies could apparently be inflated like little balloons, or little blow-up dolls, take your pick. They didn't always inflate fully, and over time their air would leak out, which Narrator said was freaky because of the noise it made. Hmmm...the Flatsies I'm familiar with don't inflate. They just are...well, FLAT, with legs and arms that bend like Tutti and Todd dolls. They live in picture frames and thus can double as a wall hanging, so that's something. Score one for storage!
WEIRD FACTOR: Ohhhhhh...5 out of 10. They're cute, they're flexible, they've got rooted hair...and they're flat. That's kinda strange, but not outrageously so.
BABY SECRET
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1965
Narrator's frequent comparisons of Baby Secret to a stupid spy didn't contribute to my enjoyment of this segment. Baby Secret DOES whisper secrets, but they're innocent little messages that normally wouldn't give kids the all-overs. Now granted, the whispering voice does freak me out a bit, and some of her phrases sound a mite R-rated to someone with a dirty mind (I admit it, LOL). Baby Secret also has a mouth that moves, just like Teenie Talk and Baby See 'n' Say do. Some find that disturbing, but I think it's cute. The doll's eyes look ever so slightly pissed though, making Baby Secret look like she's about to whisper "Go jump off a cliff."
WEIRD FACTOR: 5 out of 10. Talking dolls are nothing new, but the whisper sounds a mite sinister, and the doll looks like she might be a biter. Kinda like Teenie Talk, the same one who asks me to kiss her finger.
I love Teenie, but I never have fully trusted her. She looks like she'd like to bite a plug outta my arm. Hmmm, I need to give that dress a bath.
SPORT AND SHAVE KEN
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1980
Ken had already had facial hair by the time this guy came around; Now Look Ken had fuzzy stickers that allowed him to wear a mustache, sideburns, or channel his inner Barry Gibb. Whatever you wanted; I thought it was a riot, by the way, that Now Look Ken's commercial equated a mustache with a villain. But we're talking about Sport and Shave Ken, whose beard came from this gommy black marker. You drew on his face and then shaved it off with a razor that didn't actually cut anything. Now, if you had a man in your life that wore a beard (like I did), then you knew that beards require a fair amount of maintenance, just like the hair on our heads, and you knew what razors were for. So a Ken with a razor doesn't weird me out much, but the gloppy paint that made this particular doll's beard was kinda gross. The narrator agreed.
WEIRD FACTOR: 4 out of 10. The marker looked weird when it was in place. Indeed, this is the only Ken I've seen with facial hair that looked better without. Shaving Fun Ken looks amazing with a beard...drat it, I miss being able to take my dolls outside like Tam and Miss Emily do!!! As an aside, Jenjoy notes that this Ken was the only one with his particular head mold. Kinda cool!
SALLY SECRETS
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COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1992-1994
Sally is a glitzy toddler doll from the nineties...wait a minute, I thought we were doing the seventies and earlier. But as I've stated in the past Sally has a number of artsy little items that were trendy in the nineties, and she carries them on various parts of her body. Her shoes and earrings hide little stamps, and stickers come out of...wait a minute, her body??? Yep. I gotta admit that that's kinda weird. Sally's sister/friend (I'm not sure which) Penni Secrets carries her stickers in her hair bow, which makes a tiny bit more sense. I bet Penni's bow would be a heavy one though, and I know of old that heavy hair bows are extremely uncomfortable.
WEIRD FACTOR: 6 out of 10. The child does have stickers coming out of her chest, after all. I love this doll, though!
MY PRETTY BALLERINA
COMPANY: Tyco
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:
Also not an oldie, but she is highly similar to Dancerina and Dancerella, who ARE products of the Me Decade. My Pretty Ballerina sometimes appears on lists of glitzy toddler dolls, and...I guess she could count as such. Narrator states that this doll danced semi-on her own, and she'd continue to do so after her music stopped, which they found kinda disturbing. I'll add in my two cents and say that the doll looks a smidge stoned. Since she's a doll My Pretty Ballerina also looks robotic when she moves, but...well, she's a doll! They don't move exactly like we do.
WEIRD FACTOR: 2 out of 10. I think she's cool.
HUGO, MAN OF A THOUSAND FACES
COMPANY:
YEARS OF PRODUCTION:
Okay, now THIS one made me raise an eyebrow. Hugo is actually a puppet and is geared towards little boys, and he has facial features that one can attach to make him look like someone/something else. He's even got SCARS!!! I love the concept, but Narrator says that it was hard to get the pieces on straight, and they left a sticky residue. I wonder if that sticky stuff didn't wear off after awhile, and I know darn good and well that the sticky stuff gathered debris with time. All sticky stuff does. Narrator also notes that Hugo is weird-looking even without his extra features, with them big ol' eyes that stare.
WEIRD FACTOR: 8 out of 10. Hugo is a very interesting concept, but he's still pretty odd to look at.
BABY SOFT SOUNDS
COMPANY: Fisher-Price
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1979
According to Narrator this doll recorded your voice, but the playback wasn't great. She oddly could pick up on conversations while one thought she was off, and she also smelled like "old batteries," as the video put it. Now the dolls that I've seen make no mention of an internal recording device, but they were out-of-box so I have no way of knowing for sure.
WEIRD FACTOR: Mmmm...3 out of 10. To me she's no weirder than Little Miss Echo.
BLESS YOU BABY TENDER LOVE
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1975
Bless You Baby Tender Love. She looks pretty innocent, if a little orange. Bless You Baby Tender Love sneezes when her belly is squeezed, and because she takes a bottle her sneezes are realistically wet. Narrator stated that they owned this doll, and in addition to sneezing the little doll sounds like she's wheezing too (which she does). They felt bad for this doll because she was always sick and couldn't be made better.
WEIRD FACTOR: 7 out of 10. Sick dolls are nothing new, but usually they show some other symptom besides the sneeze, and a lot of 'em alternate between periods of illness and periods of wellness. Tam thinks this one is weird too, by the way, and...well, obviously I think she's kinda weird, or I wouldn't have given her a 7 out of 10! I intend to review this doll eventually, but life keeps getting in the way.
GROWING UP SKIPPER
COMPANY: Mattel
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 1975
The infamous Growing Up Skipper, the doll who goes through puberty with a twist of her arm. Skip and her friend Ginger were both in on it, and the backlash against these dolls was so great that Ginger never appeared again. Anyway, Narrator notes that like several of these other dolls Skip smelled funny, and I think she clicked, and sometimes she'd get stuck between her short/child self and her tall/teenage self. Poor child, sounds like she was the type who got tall and awkward as she grew. I don't know which is worse, being chubby during the gawky stage or being tall with big klutzy feet. I was chubby, my best friend got tall and gangly, and we both HATED it.
WEIRD FACTOR: 7 out of 10. Puberty is a natural, normal part of life, but I'll admit that a doll that goes through it is kinda odd. Oh, and by the way, My Scene revisited the growing up gimmick with the Growing Up Glam line. I'd rank them the same, 7 out of 10 on the weird scale.
TUB AND TOOT
COMPANY: Toys R Us
YEARS OF PRODUCTION: 2014
This doll is modern, not a seventies thing, but otherwise she belongs on this list. Why??? Because she FARTS IN HER BATHTUB!!! Let's be real, we've all farted in the bathtub at some point, and the racket it makes is hilarious. But...is it really worth it to make a doll that does it? I mean, this doll is completely innocent-looking, but press that button on her belly and...oh, not only does she make the noise, but she also apparently blows bubbles with her butt. Sigh...I have no other words.
WEIRD FACTOR: 9 out of 10. What the actual heck??? A farting doll??? Miss Emily discussed this one once, and she too was pretty weirded out.
I'm surprised that Saucy wasn't on the list! Blythe isn't either, and she was so weird that peeps didn't buy her. Neither of them are as weird as Hugo with his funny faces, and even he's not as weird as Tub and Toot, but still...I'd rank Saucy a 7 out of 10 and Blythe an 8 out of 10. Keep in mind that I'm big fans of both dolls.
Other good candidates for the list would've been Susie Sad-Eyes, Emerald the Enchanting Witch, Little Miss No-Name, and Joey Stivic, the last of whom was...don't quote me, but I think he was one of the first mass-produced anatomically correct boy dolls. His commercial made a big deal of this aspect. Furthermore, I don't think All In the Family was geared towards kids, not with the language Archie Bunker used! I think All In the Family is a riot myself, but then I'm 37 and won't be confused or horrified by the situations on the show. Thus I think the Joey Stivic doll probably was way over the heads of seventies kids. Now, disclaimer: I mean no shade towards ANY of these dolls, not even Tub and Toot. Indeed, Little Miss No-Name is very high on my wish list, and I own several of the others already. But y'all gotta admit, they're not your average dolls.
What say y'all? Do you know of any little weirdoes that belong on this list?
Cheers,
RagingMoon1987
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