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Friday, July 20, 2018

Update on Grandma

This post is likely going to be a painful one, likely for y'all and for myself as well, but...here goes.  My grandmother, to put it bluntly, is dying.  The hospital was able to get her in today, and she would have seen the doctor that did Mama's hip surgery last year, but things did not go as planned.  Late last night Grandma's blood pressure bottomed out and she got rushed to the hospital.  Mama and my maniac driver of a Second Uncle went to be with her, and they subsequently learned that Grandma has a UTI on top of everything else.  Her blood oxygen is good, but her heart is very weak and her blood pressure keeps falling.  The doctor said that she needs a pacemaker, but she's too weak to handle the surgery.  He also says...and this is the part that's really bugging me...but he says that pain medicine would make her heart rate dip even lower so they can't give her any.  That means Grandma's in pain.  And since the UTI messes with her mind that also means she's confused.

So...Mama and Second Uncle made a very hard decision.  Grandma is going back to the nursing home, and hospice is being called in.  Never in my life did I ever dream that any of us in this family would be going on hospice, but that's what's happening.  Mama says the folks at the nursing home are going to do what they can to manage Grandma's pain, but I have no idea how effective that will be.  I have no faith in that nursing home, considering that their short-staffed bungling allowed this to happen in the first place.

I guess I need to focus on the positives of all this mess, as not many thirty-year-old women have even a single grandparent, but at the same time the longer you have someone the harder it is to let them go.  I hope it'll be quick and peaceful.

Now I'm going to sit back, mope, hope that no children come into the library, and wish that I could trade places with Delilah for a week or a month.  Yes, Delilah, who has a hollow head and no heart or brain to feel or think with.  Millicent from MillicentandFriends guessed correctly that the artsy pic in the last post was Delilah Noir...whom I desperately wanted my grandmother to see.  I know she'd have liked Delilah; she liked almost all of my dolls (except for poor Johnny), and she'd have loved Delilah.
Delilah has gathered the Peanut Gallery and is keeping an eye out for storms, by the way.  On top of everything else that could happen today, we're expecting violent weather.  Here's what we're facing.
Not the worst I've seen, but not great either.

I'll keep y'all posted on what goes down with Grandma.  Right now I'm just hoping they all make it back from Sikeston in one piece.

Always,
RagingMoon1987

10 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry. I hope that they will be able to manage the pain so that your Grandmother is as comfortable as possible. I wish you and your family much strength.

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    1. Thanks, chica! Just keep the positive vibes coming. Mama isn't as upset as I thought she'd be, so I'm a bit more relaxed than I was. It's still not going to be a fun process, though.

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  2. I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother's turn for the worse. I pray for peace for everyone involved.

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    1. Thank you, sweetie. The hospice lady was very nice and made this an easy experience for everyone involved, so it could've been worse.

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  3. Oh dear, and I was becoming cautiously optimistic after your last update. I'm so sorry that it's turned out she is in worse shape than was originally thought.

    The good news is that hospice will be another level of care that will be helping fill in the gaps that the nursing home may miss. It's awful that she's got to be in pain due to her heart, but hopefully her care team has some pain management methods that can help without drugs. I'm so sorry about this and I hope she recovers to have lots of good days before her time is up.

    Write her a letter. Doesn't matter that she may never get to read it, but write her a letter with everything you want to say. Pictures of all the things you want to show her. All the feelings you want to express. A physical letter, and electronic one on your computer, it doesn't matter. Write out everything that you want her to know, and everything you want to share, and keep it. I didn't try doing this until after my grandparents were gone, and I wish I'd tried it earlier. Sometimes the only way you can reach someone is with your heart, even if they're not gone yet.

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    1. Good idea on the letter; might make a good blog post, actually. She was a big enabler for my doll hobby, LOL.

      The hospice worker seems to think that all of Grandma's problems are due to dehydration. Grandma is VERY dehydrated (she hates drinking water, LOL again), to the point that her kidneys are threatening to shut down, and the hospice worker suggested that this dehydration may be the reason why her heart went nuts. It may also be why she's so confused, though Mama also thinks she has the early stages of dementia. The hospice folks agreed to try and help us get Grandma hydrated. If we can do that there is a chance that she may once again recover. That's happened several times in the past, where Grandma would get sick, scare us all, and then bounce back. We'll just see.

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    2. I'll be keeping you guys in my thoughts. Here's hoping the hospice folks have luck with getting Grandma hydrated!

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  4. I’m so sorry. I’m glad hospice is there for your grandmother and your family. If you need help reach out to the too. They are there for family. It’s so hard to face the loss of some so important. I have tears for you. I’m a nurse and I have so much respect for hospice nurses. Take care of yourself and hug a dolly. That usually helps me ((hug))

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    1. Thanks for the words of support. The first visit should be tomorrow and I'm hoping they'll get Grandma some relief. I wanted to go see her today, but Mama told me Grandma was so loopy it wasn't worth it. She didn't know anyone, and all she could do was cry out in pain. Makes me sick just thinking about it.

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