Throwback Thursday review: Ghetto Kids

Back in July Treesa asked me if I'd heard of this line (it was featured on this YouTube video), and by sheer coincidence I had.  I ran into today's doll on Reddit earlier in the month, was shocked by the name and the concept, and...well, y'all can see what I did!  I've seen some freaky ideas for dolls before, and in theory the one I have today is no worse than other homeless dolls like Poor Pitiful Pearl, or Little Miss No-Name, or Gwen Thompson.  But the name...look at the name of this line!

GHETTO KIDS.  The Ghetto Kids are exactly what they sound like, dolls based on children that are homeless or otherwise down on their luck.  San Juan Carmen here looks happy enuff...

...but her bio says that she was abandoned in a crack house by her parents, who barely deserve the title of "parents" (her father is a drug dealer and her mother is both a smack addict and a prostitute).  San Juan Carmen's full name is Carmen Lydia Julia Gonzalez, and I will probably just call her Carmen.  According to an old L.A. Times article none of these dolls sold well, but Windy City Mary and New York Sammy were the most popular, San Juan Carmen and East L.A. Lupe resonated with the Latin community, and Beantown Cynthia was the least popular.  All of them had horrific backstories, backstories that are sadly a reality for some children of the world, backstories that drew so much backlash that the dolls' entrepreneur eventually pulled those out of the dolls' packaging.  Indeed, my doll did come with paperwork, but an extensive backstory is nowhere in sight.  I was able to find the gist of Carmen's story online, thus why I know how she "came to be."

The box itself drives the needs of these dolls even further into the wood.  They need care!

And love!

And a home!  And YOU!!!

The on-box messages remind me a little of my Sew Able doll's box.  Kristiana's problems are far different from Carmen's, but just the same her box asked her prospective owner "Can I come live with you?"  Kristiana had a home in her backstory, and she STILL wanted to live with her owner.

Before I step too high up onto my own soapbox I'm gonna power through this review, because this is...well, it's a Throwback Thursday review!  Carmen is sixteen inches tall, between Billie and Rita Cheryl in size (they are fourteen and eighteen inches, respectively).  Her head is significantly bigger than either of theirs. 

Hair first, as usual.  Carmen's hair is black and wavy and is of two different lengths. 

Here y'all can see the differing lengths.  Carmen's rocking a bit of a mullet, kinda like Aimee and Whimzee do.  I doubt that's the intention for ANY of those dolls, but it's what it looks like.

The hair looks like it would be a mass of tangles, and indeed the fibers are a little coarse, kinda like the fibers that American Girl uses for their dolls with textured hair.  But in truth Carmen's hair is tangle-free and...well, not too nasty to touch.  It's soft and wooly, and so far it's been easy to maintain.  It's certainly better hair than that of Meritus's Girls on the Go or (spoilers) B.F.C. Ink.  When it comes to doll hair looks can be extremely deceiving; B.F.C. Kaitlin's hair looks lovely but is a nightmare to maintain, while Carmen's hair looks a fright but is easy to care for.

Roots, on the other hand, are about what I expected.  The hairline is nice and tight...

...but the back is gappy enuff that pigtails are out of the question.  Otherwise Carmen's hair is thick enuff to hide the roots.

I would chalk the appearance of Carmen's hair up to her life on the streets, but her fellow Ghetto Kids don't have hair that stands up.  Some real-life children just have unmanageable hair right from the start, and that's the excuse I'm giving for Carmen.  Overall the hair is average-good, not as nice as American Girl hair, but way better than that of Girls on the Go or...dare I say it...polypropelene hair.  

Regarding the face, the Ghetto Kids have faces that only a mother could love.

And I thought the Cabbage Patch Kids were homely!  These remind me...forgive me for the racist comparison, but these goofy smiles remind me of Chief Wahoo.  I grow tired of political correctness in this country, but in the case of Chief Wahoo I'll make an exception because he made Native Americans look dumb.  But then again, aren't ALL mascots supposed to look dumb???  That's the case for a lot of 'em.  As for the Ghetto Kids, all the dolls have this same ridiculous expression so no particular race is being singled out, but I still don't like their expressions.  I'd have preferred a more serious expression for a homeless doll, something like Sasha or the Gotz dolls use.  Not heartbroken, mind you, but more pensive and thoughtful.  Heck, even a face like Poor Pitiful Pearl's would've sufficed; Pearl is smiling, but it's not an enormous, toothy smile.  But that's not what the Ghetto Kids got, so let's move on to eyes and incidentally, that huge schnozz.

The eyes look like something one might see in the funny papers.  I'm a big fan of the funnies, but I can't name the comic strip that these look like.  Certainly not Garfield or Peanuts or Calvin and Hobbes, but...somewhere I've seen these eyes.  Hmmm...maybe it was KaBlam!...no, Henry and June didn't have a lot of detail in their eyes.  But these look familiar, and kinda dumb.  They are in a smiling shape, though; not all dolls have smiling eyes.

You'd think that since Carmen's eyes look drawn her mouth would be too, but it's got a lot more realism than the eyes.  The color is natural and it's not lined in black pencil-like lines.  Carmen has a big ol' lower lip, though!

That's a nice set of choppers for someone who lives on the streets!  In school I had friends who were poor (not homeless that I know of, but poor), and all of them had had at least one tooth fall out due to decay.  It was a horrible thing to see, so maybe that's why Carmen and her ghetto buddies had full sets of teeth.  

Carmen's profile is also kinda crazy, so let's look at that for a second.

That's one crazy profile.  She's got a chin that Matt Smith and Jay Leno would approve of, a nose that's almost equally prominent, and flat, concave eye sockets.  Poor Carmen.  I respect the line's attempt to make the Ghetto Kids look unique, but in doing so they made their dolls look homely as sin and kinda dumb.  The overly cheerful expressions also detract from the message these dolls are trying to send.  I do like Carmen's vinyl though, cheap as it is; she's got a nice glow.

As to the body, Carmen is unique among my soft-bodied dolls in that she's soft enuff to lean, like so.

Unfortunately that means that Carmen won't be able to stand on her own, not without a lot of bamboozling.  Here's how she looks unclad.

When Rita Cheryl and Carmen are wearing their clothes they look like they're close in size, but when they're out of their clothes their bodies are very different.  

I doubt that Carmen can wear AG clothes...

...and I turned out to be mostly wrong!  The jacket is too long for Carmen's stubby little arms, but this outfit fits well enuff that I'd put her in it again.  Even the hat fits, and I REALLY wasn't expecting that.

As for specs, Carmen's body is lightweight, with a plain white torso and vinyl limbs that have a little give when they're squeezed.  Her limbs rotate in their sockets but do not pivot, meaning that Carmen's motion is pretty stilted.  Her neck joint is too tight for her to turn her head, which surprised me since nearly all my dolls above Barbie's height can turn their heads.  Carmen can sit, however, and if propped up she can stand...

...and she can reach out for a hug.  I think that's a fitting position for a doll like this.

Oh yes, and front-to-back splits.  Those are small potatoes for a lot of my dolls.

This vinyl feels cheap, and it's picked up a few stains here and there, but it's a pretty color, and it took to the mold...fairly well.  Carmen's hand has all the details that an American Girl hand would have; the palms are flat, but she's got obvious fingernails and creases where her fingers would bend.

Legs are about the same, short with squat, flat feet, boxy toes, and cute little knees.  Carmen's stance is a smidge pigeon-toed due to the way she's put together.

When I reviewed the Girls on the Go I commented on how being lightweight can work against a doll, and that rings true for Carmen, just as it did for Madge.  Dolls like this need a little heft to stand up, and they need to be able to reposition their feet a bit.  Neither Madge nor Carmen have the heft or the proper hip joints, so standing them up is a nightmare.  But Carmen does look cute when she sits.  Her legs don't splay apart, and her clothes are loose enuff to allow her to sit comfortably.

Right, clothes.  Here's where Carmen reminds me a lot of Poor Pitiful Pearl and Little Miss No-Name.  She's got patches and "holes" in her dress, just like they do.  First things first, though.  Of all the Ghetto Kids, I think Carmen's clothes are the most drab, though again that fits in with the concept of a homeless kid.  She wears a blue and orange long-sleeved shirt under an olive drab jumper, and she wears fuchsia sandals on her feet.

The shirt is very fallish with its orange and blue stripes.  Perfect for the time of year...sort of.  We're headed into winter now, with the temperatures to match.

Despite the bold stripes this shirt is pretty basic.  The material feels thin, and the hems are raggy in places. 

The back closes with your basic Velcro, which in this case is an alright choice.  Neither Carmen's clothes nor her body snag easily. 

Inside the shirt is a sticker (yep, a sticker and not a tag) that says those famous three words.

Carmen's dress is a pinafore-type dress, and it's got a few more details than the shirt.

The buttons don't function, but they ARE present.  Not printed or drawn like today's doll clothes might have.

The skirt is lightly gathered, and that looks nice.

On her skirt Carmen has a patch...

...and a "hole" that's been sewn up.  These are also legit items and not painted designs. 

I figure Carmen is sewing up her own clothes since her parents aren't worth diddley squat.  Anyway, aside from those little details the dress is a basic item.  It closes in the back with Velcro, and the hems are ragged here and there.

Since Carmen is homeless I can tolerate her clothes being pretty basic, but as with her body the whole thing seems kinda rushed.  Oops, I forgot the shoes!  They too are simple, being fuchsia strappy sandals that slip on.  The construction of these is actually pretty decent.

Since these dolls are homeless they don't have much in the way of accessories, just a plastic trash can.  Shucks, would a child like Carmen have the upper body strength to carry a trash can?

It's a well-made trash can, though.  Y'all know right away what it's supposed to be.  The lid locks in place if you turn it just right, and when you turn it in the opposite direction it lifts off.  Small items can be stored in here.

I was wondering if Carmen's full backstory was stored in here, but it's not.  There's just a card, with a more somber Carmen sharing a watered down version of her plight.

Without the flash it's possible to see that Carmen is holding a rag doll.  

Nuts, I kinda wish they'd included that.  Even homeless kids often have one little thing, something they can tuck into a pocket or a trash bag.

I guess that covers it.  

BAD

*I'm gonna be cruel:  these dolls are homely as sin, and their goofy expressions negate the seriousness of the overall message the dolls are trying to send. 

*Carmen's body poses poorly, and the materials used feel cheap.

*The clothes also feel cheaply made.

*My particular doll didn't come with her story, though in hindsight that may have been a good thing. 

*The name of the line is off-putting and in poor taste.

GOOD

*Hair is surprisingly nice.  I was expecting absolute crap, but this stuff is alright.

*I also like the look and feel of Carmen's vinyl.  She's got soft "skin" with a peachy glow, though in retrospect she looks a bit too healthy to be homeless. 

*While basic, the clothes cover Carmen's rear end, and they have some clever little details showing her street life.

*Can wear some American Girl clothes, albeit imperfectly. 

Overall I think this line is tragic, eye-opening, and interesting, and I can see why it's an obscure doll line now.  The name "Ghetto Kids" is in poor taste, but that's just part of the problem.  The dolls are about as homely as can be, their goofy faces don't send the message that the doll line should send, and they feel cheaply made.  I also saw one redditor comment that the dolls cost thirty bucks when they were released, putting them soundly out of reach of any children who might relate to the dolls' backstories.  Kids who COULD afford these were probably clamoring for the Bratz dolls instead.  As a final blow, I don't know what the marketing for the Ghetto Kids was like, but since I'm only now learning of them I bet it wasn't good.  Marketing is everything nowadays.  So yeah, I can see why these flopped and why they're obscure.  That said, I still recommend grabbing one of these if you can find one for a reasonable price, as they're fairly rare.  

And now, only now, am I remembering that today is Thanksgiving.  What a way to celebrate being thankful for what I've got, by showing a doll that has nothing!  Hey, I guess Carmen is a reminder to all of us that we've got it pretty good as long as we've got the basics.  Plenty of people in this world don't even have that.  So in that respect I got my money's worth out of Carmen, because she made me think.  And to my American friends, happy Thanksgiving.  We're having ham steak and the traditional Thanksgiving sides (stuffing, cranberry stuff, the works).  It's just me, Mama, and that man-child...and six cats and two dogs begging, LOL.

Cheers,
RagingMoon1987