Sunday randomness: a whole new level

A whole new level of weird, that is.  Frequent fliers of this blog know fully well that the Moon Girl revels in pushing the envelope of strange, but this one may be too strange even for some of y'all.  I'm going to birth a tiny baby.  Yes, birth, as in help it get born in a way.  Now this won't involve any blood, pain, or nudity unless I cut myself with scissors and have to strip (y'know, so I won't get blood on my new jeans), but if you're weirded out feel free to step out.  For those of y'all who choose to stay, this rather odd purchase was inspired by a video I saw on YouTube, one of this teeny-weeny little silicone baby being pulled out of an appropriately-sized amniotic sac.  The Etsy seller apparently has shuttered its store so I don't know where one could get something like this now, but I doubt this will be a repeat purchase so no biggie.  My baby came wrapped up in tissue paper and ribbon, just like a present.

I was only expecting one amniotic sac, but the baby came ensconced in two.  This bigger one apparently was used to cushion the smaller one during transit...I guess.  It's made of thick...latex?  God only knows what, but it's like a balloon.  It looks a little like a breast implant.

With all the protection that this baby got, I assumed that there would be fluids involved, and this bag reinforced that assumption.  There's a pad in there, and a tiny pair of plastic forceps.  Yikes!

My grandfather was a forceps baby, and he carried the scars for the rest of his life, in the form of a few small dents in his head.  Anyway, it took a fair amount of force to open the first bag, and inside is the second bag.  I see a little bald head in there, and an umbilical cord.

Here's the sac from the side.  As y'all can see, it too is tied off like a balloon.

This second sac fits comfortably in the palm of my hand, kinda like a stress ball.

Yeesh, I've seen stress balls that look like womens' boobies, but not babies in utero!  Regardless, I could tell at this point that the sac had no fluid in it after all, so I relaxed about making a huge mess and opened it up.  Once again, I had to exert quite an effort with the scissors, but the forceps were not needed.  Here's my baby!

Hmmm...looks like one of those toys that grows when you let it soak in water.  Definitely not the prettiest thing, especially with that umbilical cord attached.  It's a very realistic-looking cord, but let's cut that off anyway, just like we would a real baby.

Still not the prettiest baby in the world.  It's made of rough, gummy material, and thus painting those little eyes and that mouth can't have been easy.  In addition to the baby itself and the "c-section kit," the seller included several items that should determine this child's gender...

...but all of that crap is green except for the little hat.  Luckily there's also a pram inside, and it's BLUE!!!

Huzzah, I got a boy!  He looks a little like an "Ichabod" to me, since he's so funny-looking.  He looks only a little less funny with his hat (which appears to be the fingertip of a glove).

Ichabod is a little one.  He fits nicely in the palm of my hand.

He looks ridiculous in his little blue pram, though.

All of Ichabod's toys are way too big for him, especially that binky.  

Well...maybe that bottle isn't too big.  Ichabod is rubbery and soft, and he's completely flat on one side.

Yeah...weirdest thing I've ever bought on Etsy, hands down.  Luciana's Tribble was a little goofy, but there was at least a rhyme and reason for that.  By the way, "Goldie," as Luciana calls her has given us zero trouble with breeding.  So far there's just the one...and Ichabod seems to think she's a pillow.

Don't get too close to her mouth, kid.  Goldie hasn't been reproducing, but her appetite matches that of the other Tribbles.

Very truly yours,
RagingMoon1987